I know she is trying her best to bond with me.
She asked me out for movie but I declined.
She asked me out for shopping for her shoes but I declined.
As medical staff who read about bipolar, I understand about her condition and also the manifestation of the disorder. I know she is having difficult time to control her mood and herself.
I am tired. I am depressed. I am disappointed.
I am tired to be the support for her.
I am depressed and I lost my bubbly self.
I am disappointed with myself because I allowed myself to be depressed.
But at the same time, I feel guilty because I have to show her I am tired to support her anymore.
I know I am asking for too much.
I want her to be better but I cannot give her what she wants.
I know she always wants us to be close but I cannot.
Is very difficult to tell her and my parents that currently I am having my own issues to settle. And I am hanging on to it. I also have to depend on my friends for emotional support to climb up back.
As much as she is affecting me, I believe I'm affecting her as well. Thus, I called it even.
No comments:
Post a Comment